Pink Think: “[on having children] It really changes your perspective on the world. You know, I’ve had my day. I made some films, and I’ve really had a very fortunate life, and it’s time for me to share that a little bit. Having children takes the focus off yourself, which I’m really grateful for. I’m so tired of thinking about myself. I’m sick of myself. You feel you want to be there and not miss out on anything. It’s a true joy and a very profound love. You can write a book, you can make a movie, you can paint a painting, but having kids is the most extraordinary thing I’ve ever taken on.” – Brad Pitt
Image from dailycatholic.org
Yesterday, I helped out at my older daughter’s “Author’s Day” at her junior high. I was looking forward to hearing published authors including Jessica Day George. As usual, the “riot in a bottle” didn’t disappoint. She had the audience cracking up from the get go. That’s no easy feat in a gymful of junior high kids.
***
I went to my assigned room and sat through roll call while another YA author wrote out her website information on the white board.
Here’s the weird thing.
When the author started talking about her books, and the process of being published, and mentioning book signings…
I sat there, restless. I felt exhausted all of a sudden. An image came to mind. It was one of a guinea pig running in a wheel in a cage.
Like a wake-up call, if you will. Let me explain.
***
For the past four years or so, since my youngest began kindergarten, I have just been a writing machine. I had a writing to-do list that progressively became more challenging:
Write a new story.
Finish first draft.
Revise draft.
Edit draft.
Query agents.
Don’t dwell on rejection and move on.
Start all over again….
It’s been that way for the last four years. My family has been very patient meanwhile. They don’t bat an eyelash aymore if I drag my laptop to the kitchen table while they watch NBA games. Nightly walks with my husband, I usually talk his ear off about my writing progress. I live, breathe and eat writing.
***
Watching and listening to the YA author, I realized that the last four years I have been very obsessed with the idea of being published. I have been like a writer in a wheel. Sure, I have made strides towards my goal, but at what expense?
And after being published, what? It’s on to the next project, needing to be better than the last…
I still want to be published, don’t get me wrong. But I don’t want it to be so consuming that I’m seeing nothing but the spokes of my wheel.
Author’s Day gave me something I hardly expected. I thought I’d come away inspired, which I did. What I didn’t count on was gaining healthy perspective. I can still write and go for my goals, but it is not the end-all.
There’s a lot more to life than my writing wheel, and I need to remember that.
Follow